Talking to your teen about the HPV virus

As any parent knows, you can communicate a lot to your child without ever saying a word. When it comes to sexuality, the way you react to certain situations, how you deal with topics related to their body and your own, how you feel about privacy, and what you choose to actually sit down and talk about all communicate strong messages. But if you feel uneasy about discussing sexuality and contraception openly, rest assured, you're not alone.

While talking to your child about sexual issues may not be easy, it is necessary. Getting your child to talk to you is a challenge. Remember how you used to talk to your friends, and not your parents? Your child will no doubt get sexual information from their friends, from their doctors, from the school nurse. Most schools do have a sexual health education program. There is also sexual health information disseminated through the media.

But research suggests that teens trust their parents for guidance. Your child trusts you to give them the facts. Children need your support, your approval, your trust. Tell them what they need to know about the HPV virus. Use this web site as a conversation starter - send the HPVinfo.ca link to your child and suggest a talk after they have taken a look at the information.

Being an askable Parent

Nobody knows your child as well as you do...and for this simple reason, you should best know when your child or teen can handle talking about contraception or sexuality. The best way to start is to look for "teachable moments".

These moments are all around you. Maybe you and your child see a pregnant woman, a display of condoms at a drug store, or a love scene in a movie or on television. Take these opportunities to discuss your feelings and values and to ask your child if he or she has any questions. It's not really that important what you talk about, so long as you're talking. This way, when your child needs to talk to someone, they'll know that it's okay to come to you.

Obviously, you won't know the answer to everything, but if you avoid the issue, children may feel that contraception or sexual health issues are taboo. Just remember that study after study has shown that sex education does not lead to an increase in sexual activity. But it does lead to safer and more positive interactions now and in the future.

Answer questions honestly. Your child will probably know if you're not being completely straight with them. Admit when you don’t have the answers—this teaches your children to trust you. You can also use this opportunity to teach them how to get the facts with you, so one day they can make their own informed decisions. For a good start, visit the www.sexualityandu.ca and www.hpvinfo.ca websites.

If you just can't bring yourself to discuss sexuality with your child, ask for help from a knowledgeable adult or professional whom you and your child trust and feel comfortable talking to. This "first step" may ease your discomfort and provide a way for you to follow‐up later.